Invective
Kim du Toit
February 21, 2007
6:32 AM CDT
Yesterday I spoke of anger and invective, and my frequent use thereof.
I am but a babe in the woods, however, compared to the two most recent additions to the Cool Britannia blogroll, Mr. Eugenides and The Devil’s Kitchen. Here’s a sample from Mr. Eugenides, simply entitled:
Patsy Hewitt + rusty saw + bucketful of plague rats = better world
This is, as you may have noticed by now, a government of addled-brained fuckwits; the parade of nonentities, dolts and thugs who have occupied the great ministries of state over the last few years must count as some of the worst people ever to do so (and yes, I include John Selwyn Gummer in that assessment). Incompetent, illiberal, scheming, preening, self-important, spin-obsessed, lying cocksuckers to a man (and woman) - the kind of people who would fuck their own children in the ass, bareback and without lubricant, if it guaranteed them a good headline - they have, almost without exception, debased those offices and treated the public with contempt on a daily basis.
Yet, as regular readers will know, there is one member of this cabinet of unparalleled cuntery who really boils my piss, and that is Her Majesty’s Secretary of State for Health. Commissar Hewitt - no, let us call her Patsy: my sin, my soul. Pat-sy: a disapproving purse of the lips taking a trip of two steps round the palate to a hiss, at two, through the teeth. Pat. Sy.
...and after that introduction, he gets
really nasty.
For colorful imagery, though, it’s hard to top our friend in The Devil’s Kitchen, who, in describing BritPM Tony Blair, says:
We are ruled by scum, absolute fucking scum. And please don’t think that the Europhile Conservatives will be any better, because they won’t.
I’m so ragingly angry that I’m afraid that I cannot continue. I might go and murder Blair before I have some breakfast, the bastard son of a fucking bastard. Prepare the cockroaches: they’re going into his every orifice...
Makes my brief discourse on Ted Kennedy, me and a lead pipe look quite tame by comparison, doesn’t it?
Of course, both the above blog anonymously, whereas my blogname is the same as that on my Concealed Handgun License, so I must perforce be a trifle more circumspect than they are.
But I have to tell you all: I love insult and calumny when hurled at self-important turdbrains like Those Who Would Rule Us. I don’t really care which politicians get slimed (other than my own paisan Rep. Sam Johnson, blessings be upon him). As far as I’m concerned, you want to stand up on a podium and utter bullshit masquerading as rhetoric, you should expect the rotten tomatoes and apples.
And with men like The Englishman, Mr. Free Market, The Devil and Mr. Eugenides in such fine fruit-flinging form, perhaps there’s hope yet for our Cousins Across The Pond.
I can but try to be a pale shadow, by comparison.
