Interesting Situation

November 26, 2008
9:49 AM CST

Here’s an interesting situation. Most of us are against the War On Drugs, for various reasons, but most of all, I suspect, we look on the whole law enforcement issue with a jaundiced eye ever since “no-knock” warrants and property seizures became part of the business—i.e. when our rights got trampled on in ever-increasing measure, all for a few ounces (okay, grams) of Columbian Marching Powder.

Most recent, of course, has been the epidemic of random drug tests, foisted on us for good reasons—i.e. if one is a bus driver—and not-so good reasons—like when new employees have to undergo these horrible intrusions on our privacy, in the private sector.

Note that I understand the need for the latter testing, but I don’t agree with it. (For the record, I refuse point-blank to undergo a drug test of any kind because I can state under oath that I do not take illegal narcotics of any kind, nor any other drug to excess—and that, as far as I am concerned, is the beginning and the end of it.)

So I look on this outcome with mixed emotions:

The Whizzinator is a prosthetic penis that comes with a heating element and fake urine.

U S Attorney Mary Beth Buchanan’s office says the goal of it and another device called Number 1 was to help people pass drug tests.

George Wills and Robert Catalano each pleaded guilty Monday to two conspiracy counts and face up to eight years in prison, a $500 million (£334,000) fine or both.

They owned the California-based internet company Puck Technology and the devices were sold from 2005 to 2008.

“The Whizzinator is the ultimate solution for a drug testing device,” says a statement on the website of the California-based company, which calls itself the “undisputed leader in synthetic urine.”

“The prosthetic penis is very realistic and concealing is simple, while our quality production and materials assures you that the Whizzinator will let it flow again and again, anytime, anywhere you need it!”

Mr Catalano and Mr Wills pleaded guilty to conspiracy to sell drug paraphernalia and conspiracy to defraud the United States government.

Frankly, I think that this is pure and utter bullshit. To call a fake urine dispenser “drug paraphernalia” would have Orwell’s O’Brien nodding his head in agreement; and pardon me for even thinking this, but wouldn’t the use of said device be a conspiracy to defraud the government, as opposed to its manufacture?

If one prints fake U.S. currency, can the makers of the printing device be part of a “conspiracy” too?

Yeah, I know: the express purpose of the Whizzinator (splendid name) is to defeat a drug test, and would likely only be used by someone intent on defeating the test/trap. Speaking traps, has the Fed ever prosecuted the manufacturers of radar detectors under the same principle?

Sorry: but this one smells to me, and it smells worse than real urine. In fact, on principle, I wish I’d bought a Whizzinator before now, just in case.

Discuss in Comments.

Blast From The Past (20)

November 26, 2008
8:57 AM CST

On the importance of heroes.

OO-rah

November 26, 2008
7:37 AM CST

Summary: ragheads tangle with our Devil Dogs, get asses kicked. Reader 1911Fan said the report would put a smile on my face: it did, and it will do the same for you.

Semper Fi.

Barricades, Explained

November 26, 2008
6:04 AM CST

In a long-ago discussion in Comments, I made the statement that if I had my preference, I’d like to die either asleep in my wife’s arms, or else on the barricades.

I think I’d better explain the latter, because someone may get the wrong impression, and I’d hate that to happen.

Although I’ve started to look like a Frenchman and am descended from the French, most Gallic qualities have long since been burned off by the passage of generations. Most especially, the need for le geste magnifique, mais inutile (the magificent, but futile, gesture) has long ago been purged from my psyche.

So don’t expect me to rush to the barricades when The Glorious Day comes, AK clutched in wrinkled grasp, with ringing exhortations coming from my lips.

I am uncomfortable in the role of “revolutionary leader”. I’m not a rabble rouser, or an agitator. I seek not to form an army, or an underground movement, or any kind of Maquis. I don’t care about glory, or notoriety, or any of that nonsense. I am, quite simply, a man who will go so far, and no further, and who will resist oppression without fanfare, without recognition, and without a qualm.

I am also not a terrorist, or “freedom fighter”, and I will never engage in any activities which are proactive against Our Enemy, The State.

I may, however, choose to resist, in a manner of my own choosing, because I have various boundaries, personal boundaries, which may or may not be the same as those of others.

So my “barricade” would be a lot simpler, and a lot more personal.

It could be at my doorstep, when agents of the State come to confiscate my suddenly-illegal guns.

It could be in a court of law, when I am forced to choose between paying a fine for disobeying an unjust law, and going to prison. (It will, I promise you, be the latter.)

It could be when the State tries to confiscate or trespass on my property.

It could be when the State threatens my family.

It could be when the State tries to load me, or any other “undesirables”, into the cattle cars (real, or metaphysical).

It could be when an agent of the State demands ”Papieren, bitte” and I show them my tattoo instead.

It could be when I am restricted in, or forbidden to exercise my freedom of speech, or any of the other freedoms enumerated in the Constitution and the Bill of Rights. I will decide what constitutes “reasonable” when it comes to restrictions thereon, and not some Congressman, lawyer, judge, policeman or government bureaucrat.

Just like Nock before me, I’m not intent on “setting an example”, or influencing others, or making a splash of any kind. Those who wish, may do what I do, or not. Those who wish to castigate me for my choices may do so, but it will have no effect. Those who wish to use me as an example do so without my consent or blessing, and those who expect me to “lead” them will be disappointed.

I am a quiet man, a reasonable man, but I am not nor will ever be a slave to the State. I left one country to escape that, and I will not live like that in my adopted one.

So if I die on the barricades, it may be known to others, or else just an unseen spark which flickers and dies in the darkness. Either way, I am indifferent. But it will be known to the agents of the State, I can promise you that. I will not go quietly into that dark night of oppression. It may well turn out to have been a futile gesture, but it will not be futile for me.

I may have lost most Gallic qualities, as I said earlier, but the one I have most definitely lost is the impulse to surrender.

And that’s all I’ll have to say on the topic. Ever.

-----------------------------------

You will note that Comments are closed on this post. That’s because I don’t need or even want to see any. This is a statement of unalterable personal principle, and no other comment is needed.

Wallpaper 11/26/08

November 26, 2008
5:05 AM CST

View Over The Marina, Chicago 2000

Looking south-east from our apartment window; that’s Lake Michigan in the background. The apartment towers are not as close as they seem: I’d zoomed in quite a bit to “frame” the picture properly.

Here’s the front door of the building:

The building was originally erected in 1910, and had two apartments per floor (thirteen floors and a full-floor penthouse at the top; we were on the tenth). As was the custom of the time, the walls were built so thick that you could not hear sound from other apartments, only occasionally your neighbor’s front door opening and closing. Even cordless phones wouldn’t transmit between rooms: we had to put the base unit out in the passage for them to work at all.

Add a fireplace, steam heat and matchless views… we’d move back there in a heartbeat, except of course for Richard Daley and Chicago gun laws, which would make me a criminal because I’d ignore all of them.