Dept. Of Righteous Shootings
Kim du Toit
October 17, 2007
5:06 AM CDT
HWGA:
A Northwest Dallas homeowner shot and killed an intruder early Tuesday after being alerted by his pet parrot that someone was on the premises.
John Woodson, 46, was transported to Parkland Memorial Hospital, where he died, Dallas police Sgt. Larry Lewis said.
Police were called to the 3600 block of Cortez Drive around 3:30 a.m. The home, which also is used as a locksmith shop, had been burglarized four times this month, Sgt. Lewis said.
Best part about this one was the fact that Our Hero was awakened by his pet parrot, which greeted the late scumbag with a ”Hello!” call. (Perhaps ”Duck, asswipe!” might have been a better choice of words, but then again I’m not in the parrot training business.)
[pause to let jeers and derisive laughter die away]
Anyway, the article is a mine of useful information about other Righteous Shootings which have happened in the Dallas area recently. The best part is the way the reporter gets smacked down (the DMN is a liberal roll of toilet paper). After a lengthy recitation of choirboy extinctions, the report says:
Earlier this year, Texas lawmakers approved the Castle Law, which removes any obligation for a crime victim to retreat before responding with deadly force when faced with an intruder in his or her home, vehicle or business.
In other words, an implication that this legislation is the cause of all these ventilated Goblins.
But the Dallas cops are having none of it:
Sgt. Lewis said he would not describe the series of shootings as a trend, nor did he believe the law had empowered more people to shoot to kill. “We get them over the year from time to time,” Sgt. Lewis said of intruder shootings.
That’s my kinda cop. Gawd, I love Texas.
But Our Hero should have the last word:
“I got hit five times this month. I have tools in my garage, my house and my van,” Mr. Baker said. “They were coming here like they owned the place. I hate what happened, but somebody has to do what’s necessary.”
“The fifth time is enough. It’s not something you want to do, but you have to do.”
Dead goblin count: 159